Funniest Pond Stories-Part 1, May 2004
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Article by: Brett Fogle Get ready for some gut-wrenching, laugh out loud hilarious pond stories from all over the world... (Continued from May Issue of PondStuff!) We had some hilarious, truly gut wrenching, laugh out-loud stories sent in by some of you. Here we're going to highlight some of the funniest stories for you to read. We had entries from all over the place , Adirondack Chairs - How to Choose One (Inluding one all the way from THAILAND!) The competition was fierce, and to be honest - I had a really hard time deciding on one 'funniest' story, but here's a brief rundown of our entries: cats, dogs, and bunnies (?) all taking the Nestea plunge right into the water, , Spring is Almost Here - March Gardening Tips a hungry KOI nibbling in dangerous territory, a missing , Growing Great Potatoes flip flop, an electrifying experience for grandma, fun for the whole family, fish frape, and flying fish , Deer Ticks to boot! First, let's start with this very funny story about 'Smokey' - who apparently thinks he can walk on water. , Painted Adirondack Chairs-The Perfect Addition to Any Home or Garden This was sent in by Mike Lachance from Maryland: Funny Pond , Painted Adirondack Chairs-The Perfect Addition to Any Home or Garden Story #1 "I wish I had a photo to share of this very true story but any ponder with cats has likely had the same experience at some time or another. Several years ago, when I was enjoying the second season of my first pond , Preaparing Your Plants For Winter (I have now built four as I've moved around), one of our cats, "Smokey", who was a natural , The Cottage Garden hunter in her prime, saw a mockingbird alight on a lilly pad to get a drink of water. , Snakes - They're Not as Slithery as Some People I Know! Well, old "Smokester" slowly crept out from under some day lillies and made a spectacular jump with all four paws majestically carrying her like a flying squirrel, right for that intruding bird. , Preaparing Your Plants For Winter It is not as though she had not already had a couple of encounters with the water , Tips for Garden Decoration but that day the feathered treat must have been too much for her to pass up. Well, both my wife and I were there to see her make a wonderful belly flop into the pond. , 7 Tips for Creating Fresh Hydrangea Bouquets Of course, the bird , Flowering Trees - How to Make Your Garden Shady and Beautiful at the Same Time was out of the way in plenty of time and I swear that that cat walked on her toes the five feet it took her to get out of the water! , How to Choose a Pond or Fountain Light And of course, after removing herself from the water, , Create Your Own Special Herb Garden in a very nonchalant manner, proceeded to lift each leg, shake off the water , Solar Outdoor Lighting and as much as say "I meant to do that, you know". Smokey often spent time at the pond , Garden Sheds later, using her tail to attract the fish , Hydroponics Gardening - An Introduction To Hydroponics Gardening For Beginners (Part 15) Ozone (she would put it in the water , Tulip Trees - The King of the Magnolias and swish it around and the fish , Compost YES, Epsom Salts NO would come up to explore it. She never did catch one). She also loved to sit at the waterfall , Garden for Birds #4 and enjoy the water moving past her. So that is my funny pond , 7 Tips for Creating Fresh Hydrangea Bouquets story. === Funny Pond , Stressed Out? Maybe You Need a Gazebo Story #2 "Dear all at McArthur, My funniest pond , Edgeworthia Chrysantha story is about my late aunt, who introduced me to the joy of backyard , A Rather Shady Affair ponds. Donna had a large koi pond , Solar Outdoor Lighting in her backyard that she devoted endless amounts of love and attention to. As happens with most ponds, , Garden Sheds spring , Wildlife in Winter Ponds brought some uninvited guests...in this case frogs. One evening Donna was working on the pond, checking the cantankerous pump , Garden for Birds #4 and filter system, and using her net to skim out leaves and what not that had blown in. My 80+ plus year old grandmother was supervising the work and offering her expert opinion on how to , Flowering Trees - Make Your Garden Shady and Beautiful at the Same Time proceed. They were amazed at the number of frogs that had taken up residence, and not too happy about it. Donna noticed a frog swimming at the far side of the pond , How to Choose a or Fountain Light that she wanted to get out...something was not quite right about the way he was swimming, and she pointed him out to Grandma. "Mom, look at that frog swimming on his back!" Grandma was a bit skeptical...frogs doing the back stroke were a phenomenon that she was unfamiliar with. She advised that this misfit should be removed immediately. Don't want to give the other little froggies strange ideas. Donna made several attempts at scooping the miscreant up with her net, but he was just out of reach. Only one thing left to do. Roll up your shorts and wade in after him. The answer to Mr. Frogs strange swimming technique became painfully obvious as soon as Donna reached his immediate vacinity....a faulty under water light , Compost YES, Epsom Salts NO had shorted and electrocuted him! Donna didn't need her electric rollers for a few days after that!" Enecia Sabroff Funny Pond , Basics of Landscaping Story #3 "Hello----My husband recently bought a beagle puppy, at this time he was 8 weeks old. My husband also bought two almost, semi-tame rabbits to help train the puppy to track rabbits. At this time I only had one pond , Stock Lawn Mower Parts For Greater Availability Of Mowers that was preformed 550 gallons, my husband put one of the rabbits out to platy with the puppy, the rabbit was teasing the puppy, running a little ways then jumping over his head, then the rabbit decided he didn't want to play anymore so he started to run from Bear (the puppy), and he dove into the pond. We were thinking that Bear would go around the pond , How to Grow a Pineapple to the other side and continue chasing the bunny, but Bear just dove right in, he was so little though that he had to be rescued from the small backyard , Deer Ticks pond. My husband's only response was "he's going to be a good rabbit dog!" Well, thanks for listening to my story. Sincerely, Roberta Collins Toledo, Ohio Funny Pond , A Rather Shady Affair Story #4 "A story to share... Two years ago I started with the crazy idea of building , Oregano: Joy of the Mountain a small pond with koi , Tips for Garden Decoration fishes. After a lot of working I finally built it, and decorated it with all sort of plants. , Small Backyard Mini-Ponds are Low on Maintenance and Easy to Install One day... mi female cat "Manchita" went to the pond , Small Backyard Mini-s are Low on Maintenance and Easy to Install to examine this new construction. She went to the border, jumped on a flat stone , Stock Lawn Mower Parts For Greater Availability Of Mowers and starter to drink water. , Garden Benches To her big surprise one of the fishes , possibly thinking that the white , Teak Patio Furniture nose of my cat was food, , Fish Health in Hot Summer Heat jumped out of the water, , Tulip Trees - The King of the Magnolias trying to eat it.. Can you imagine the surprise of the cat ? I believe that the fish , Gallica Roses was also quite impressed with the experience. My cat almost fell into the pond , Basics of Landscaping , .. and from then on she never went around the pond , Create Your Own Special Herb Garden again. She used to watch the pond , Spring Wild Flowers from my dorm, located in the second floor and just across the pond. , Compost YES, Epsom Salts NO Unfortunately I did not take a picture of this "accident". I am sending you a pictute of this first pond; in the meantime I did build another, larger one. Unfortunately "Manchita" is not around any more, she passed away a few month ago, from old age.. This story happened in Valdivia, a city located in the south of Chile. In this country winter , Flowering Trees - How to Make Your Garden Shady and Beautiful at the Same Time is approaching, with lots of leaves falling from the trees , How to Grow a Pineapple an the plants in my pond , Use Floating Row Covers to Grow Better Cucumbers Without Spraying preparing themselves to sleep for a while..." Maria Fresard == Funny Pond , Small Backyard Mini-s are Low on Maintenance and Easy to Install Story #5 "I have two ponds. , 6 Factors that Directly Decide the Landscaping Design of a Home Garden An upper and lower pond. , The Cottage Garden The upper pond , Use Floating Row Covers to Grow Better Cucumbers Without Spraying is fed by a waterfall , Tulip Trees - The King of the Magnolias with the source being the lower pond , Small Garden Design - Creating Illusions Of More Space (driven by a pump). The lower pond , Create Your Own Special Herb Garden is fed by an overflow of the upper pond that flows underground for about 70 feet (12 in drain pipe). Last summer I rescued some trout fingerlings from a seasonal stream going dry near my home. , Gardening: Plants and Gardens I put them in the lower pond. , Solar Lights for Walkways - Cut Costs This spring I was sitting in my kitchen , Edgeworthia Chrysantha and could see something flopping on my water fall. , Landscape Design - Well Balanced Home Landscaping The trout had migrated up the overflow tube and were trying to swim further upstream via the water falls. , A Rather Shady Affair No so funny but does show the strength of nature. , Landscape Design - Well Balanced Home Landscaping Just a few weeks ago, Egrets found the pond , Garden Sheds and the fish. , Oregano: Joy of the Mountain There is nothing left to migrate at this time. Not so funny but does an Egret taste anything like a turkey when cooked?" Tom Gegenheimer == Funny Pond , Garden Gazebo - A Stunning Addition to any Landscape Story #6 "We have only had a pond , Stock Lawn Mower Parts For Greater Availability Of Mowers for a short time ... details can be seen at http://thailand4life.net/smithgarden/ The funny story must include the workmen (in Thailand) who took zero safety , Why are Adirondack Chairs & Adirondack Furniture a Cottage Favorite? precautions when constructing the pond. , Oregano: Joy of the Mountain Watching guys shovelling concrete , Garden for Birds #4 from a lorry and spreading it across the bottom of the pond , Your Garden - Growing from Seed ... when the footwear they had was just 'flip-flops' resulted in great entertainment .... especially when. several times, the flip flops came off and were lost in the cement somewhere (eventually found while they walked around bare footed) .... pictures at http://thailand4life.net/smithgarden/images/large/DSC03062.jpg http://thailand4life.net/smithgarden/images/large/DSC03070.jpg http://thailand4life.net/smithgarden/images/large/DSC03060.jpg Strangely it was only the guys .... the women laborers all wore Wellington boots .... maybe this reflects on which of the sexes is really the most sensible?" Regards, Chris == Funny Pond , Solar Outdoor Lighting Story #7 "I am building , Gallica Roses a pond , Hydroponics Gardening - An Introduction To Hydroponics Gardening For Beginners (Part 15) Ozone at this time and I was in the process of building a waterfall , Stock Lawn Mower Parts For Greater Availability Of Mowers in the corner of a fence. The waterfall , Toxic Pollutants & Their Effect on Fish Health is about 3 feet high and 7 feet wide. I thought I was finishing up the waterfall , Tips for Garden Decoration with some flat , Painted Adirondack Chairs-The Perfect Addition to Any Home or Garden rock on the very top. So I straddeled thewaterfall with my knees on the second ledge and set the flat , Garden Benches rock on top. When I did this the whole waterfall , Garden Gazebo - A Stunning Addition to any Landscape fell down because I build it on blocks and not a pile of dirt. When it fell one big rock caught my foot and I slide down the fall and fell backwards into the pond , Fish Health in Hot Summer Heat going all the way under and had a couple of big rocks come down on me. Meanwhile my wife is laughing her butt of at me and I asked her to help me out she slipped on the flat , How To Use Feng Shui Oustside Your Home wet rock that surounded the ponds , Small Backyard Mini-s are Low on Maintenance and Easy to Install edge and half way fell in with me. Now my two boys were playing in the yard , How To Use Feng Shui Oustside Your Home they are 5 and 3 and saw this happen to us and they thought it was time to got swimming so guess who jumped into the pond , Spring is Almost Here - March Gardening Tips with us, the boys. Nothing like having the whole family in on the pond. , Gardening: Plants and Gardens We laughed for awhile but then I had to rebuild the whole waterfall , Hydroponics Gardening - An Introduction To Hydroponics Gardening For Beginners (Part 15) Ozone again and this time I put the top rocks on from the side." Robert H Coppa Jr. == Funny Pond , Edgeworthia Chrysantha Story #8 I decided 300 gallons would be perfect. I did all the math and spent a great deal of time working with more experienced ponders. Somehow when it was all said and done my little 300 gallon pond , Landscape Design - Well Balanced Home Landscaping ended up being 810 gallons and come to find out it was yet another one of my mathematical errors. Guess I should have paid more attention in that college level math class required for my Associates, right. We got the pond , Why are Adirondack Chairs & Adirondack Furniture a Cottage Favorite? all up and running but because of the miscalculation we now needed a bigger pump , Adirondack Chairs - How to Choose One to feed the waterfall so I went to our local , Preaparing Your Plants For Winter water garden , How To Use Feng Shui Oustside Your Home supplier and asked which one to get. Budget was a concern so it was recommended that we got a ¾ HP submersible pump , Preaparing Your Plants For Winter that cycles 44 gallons a minuet. It was only $70 in comparison to the $170 one that was its comparative alternative so"¦ we went that route. $70 dollars later we had a working pond , Landscape Design - Well Balanced Home Landscaping with a beautiful waterfall! , Your Garden - Growing from Seed I was so excited I could hardly wait to get fish. , 6 Factors that Directly Decide the Landscaping Design of a Home Garden Again budget was a concern so we went to the local , Create Your Own Special Herb Garden pet store and picked up $50 dollars worth of fish, , Preaparing Your Plants For Winter about 8 fish. , Gallica Roses 4 large gold Koi, some yellow and a blue , Adirondack Chairs: An Ole' Time Becon for Rest Koi. The color , Small Backyard Mini-Ponds are Low on Maintenance and Easy to Install excited me so much I never considered what would happen when the fish , Stressed Out? Maybe You Need a Gazebo became comfortable in their new home. , Why are Adirondack Chairs & Adirondack Furniture a Cottage Favorite? The swam around investigating for a day or two then started to come up missing. , Oregano: Joy of the Mountain I had it figured that they were hiding or that a cat was getting fed to well but I never figured it was something I could have done. It was the pump"¦ the intake valve on the pump , Adirondack Chairs - How to Choose One was to large and the fish , Solar Lights for Walkways - Cut Costs were getting to close and being sucked into the pump , Compost YES, Epsom Salts NO though the motor pushed down the hose into my waterfall. , Basics of Landscaping While this is not a funny story, I must have cried for 3 days, I wanted to share it because this is the one thing I never read anything about in all the 6 weeks of reading I did on the web. , Create Your Own Special Herb Garden I can chuckle about it now with a "˜I can"™t believe I didn"™t think of that"™ thought. Had I known this was possible I would have done something to prevent it by caging in my pump , How to Grow a Pineapple or spending the extra $100 to get the right kind of pump. , Why are Adirondack Chairs & Adirondack Furniture a Cottage Favorite? Hope someone else can save , Spring Wild Flowers a Koi , 6 Factors that Directly Decide the Landscaping Design of a Home Garden by my blending experience. Thanks, New to ponds , How to Grow a Pineapple and already thinking of making it fish , Oregano: Joy of the Mountain free!" Sheri Furr == Well that's it for this year's 'Funniest Pond , Compost YES, Epsom Salts NO Stories'... Hope you enjoyed them as much as I did!************************************************** Brett Fogle is the owner of MacArthur Water Gardens , Adirondack Chairs - How to Choose One and several other pond-related websites including MacArthurWatergardens.com and Pond-Filters-Online.com. He also publishes a free monthly newsletter called PondStuff! with a reader circulation of over 9,000. To sign up for the free newsletter and receive our FREE 'New Pond , Preaparing Your Plants For Winter Owners Guide' visit MacArthur Water Gardens , Outdoor Sports Lighting today! ************************************************** |
  
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