Funniest Pond Stories-Part 1, May 2004
|
Article by: Brett Fogle Get ready for some gut-wrenching, laugh out loud hilarious pond stories from all over the world... (Continued from May Issue of PondStuff!) We had some hilarious, truly gut wrenching, laugh out-loud stories sent in by some of you. Here we're going to highlight some of the funniest stories for you to read. We had entries from all over the place , Revolutionary New Pond Combines Both Preformed Pond with Watercourse (Inluding one all the way from THAILAND!) The competition was fierce, and to be honest - I had a really hard time deciding on one 'funniest' story, but here's a brief rundown of our entries: cats, dogs, and bunnies (?) all taking the Nestea plunge right into the water, , Why Teak Coffee Tables Are Essential For Your Outdoor Space a hungry KOI nibbling in dangerous territory, a missing , Planning Your Garden from Scratch - the Planting flip flop, an electrifying experience for grandma, fun for the whole family, fish frape, and flying fish , How to Grow Wildflowers to boot! First, let's start with this very funny story about 'Smokey' - who apparently thinks he can walk on water. , Palm Tree Care This was sent in by Mike Lachance from Maryland: Funny Pond , Automate Your Lawn Work Story #1 "I wish I had a photo to share of this very true story but any ponder with cats has likely had the same experience at some time or another. Several years ago, when I was enjoying the second season of my first pond , Automate Your Lawn Work (I have now built four as I've moved around), one of our cats, "Smokey", who was a natural , Greenhouse Gardening as a Hobby hunter in her prime, saw a mockingbird alight on a lilly pad to get a drink of water. , Design Your Own Rose Garden Well, old "Smokester" slowly crept out from under some day lillies and made a spectacular jump with all four paws majestically carrying her like a flying squirrel, right for that intruding bird. , Flag Day: Will You Be Ready? It is not as though she had not already had a couple of encounters with the water , Growing Vegetables and Fruit by Organic Gardening but that day the feathered treat must have been too much for her to pass up. Well, both my wife and I were there to see her make a wonderful belly flop into the pond. , Why Teak Coffee Tables Are Essential For Your Outdoor Space Of course, the bird , Southwestern Landscape Art - An Investment? was out of the way in plenty of time and I swear that that cat walked on her toes the five feet it took her to get out of the water! , How to Grow African Violets And of course, after removing herself from the water, , Make a Plan for Vacation ing in a very nonchalant manner, proceeded to lift each leg, shake off the water , Fast, Biologically Active, Highly-Efficient, No-Turn Composting-Really! and as much as say "I meant to do that, you know". Smokey often spent time at the pond , Make a Plan for Vacation Watering later, using her tail to attract the fish , Discover the Art of Topiary (she would put it in the water , Garden Makeover On A Budget and swish it around and the fish , Patio Canopies: Protecting Your Patio From The Elements would come up to explore it. She never did catch one). She also loved to sit at the waterfall , Lawn Mower Racing and enjoy the water moving past her. So that is my funny pond , Accentuate Your Home with an Address Plaque story. === Funny Pond , Bedding Plants and Plugs (small plants) Story #2 "Dear all at McArthur, My funniest pond , Wicker Patio Furniture - Buying and Maintenance Tips story is about my late aunt, who introduced me to the joy of backyard , Green Thumb Gifts: Beyond Gardening Gloves ponds. Donna had a large koi pond , Best Perennial Plants for Summer Color in her backyard that she devoted endless amounts of love and attention to. As happens with most ponds, , How to Grow Wildflowers spring , Patio Canopies: Protecting Your Patio From The Elements brought some uninvited guests...in this case frogs. One evening Donna was working on the pond, checking the cantankerous pump , 5 Simple Steps to Care For Your Push Reel Mower and filter system, and using her net to skim out leaves and what not that had blown in. My 80+ plus year old grandmother was supervising the work and offering her expert opinion on how to , Southwestern Landscape Art - An Investment? proceed. They were amazed at the number of frogs that had taken up residence, and not too happy about it. Donna noticed a frog swimming at the far side of the pond , Concrete Mold Buying Tips that she wanted to get out...something was not quite right about the way he was swimming, and she pointed him out to Grandma. "Mom, look at that frog swimming on his back!" Grandma was a bit skeptical...frogs doing the back stroke were a phenomenon that she was unfamiliar with. She advised that this misfit should be removed immediately. Don't want to give the other little froggies strange ideas. Donna made several attempts at scooping the miscreant up with her net, but he was just out of reach. Only one thing left to do. Roll up your shorts and wade in after him. The answer to Mr. Frogs strange swimming technique became painfully obvious as soon as Donna reached his immediate vacinity....a faulty under water light , How to Build Fences had shorted and electrocuted him! Donna didn't need her electric rollers for a few days after that!" Enecia Sabroff Funny Pond , 5 Simple Steps to Care For Your Push Reel Mower Story #3 "Hello----My husband recently bought a beagle puppy, at this time he was 8 weeks old. My husband also bought two almost, semi-tame rabbits to help train the puppy to track rabbits. At this time I only had one pond , Fast, Biologically Active, Highly-Efficient, No-Turn Composting-Really! that was preformed 550 gallons, my husband put one of the rabbits out to platy with the puppy, the rabbit was teasing the puppy, running a little ways then jumping over his head, then the rabbit decided he didn't want to play anymore so he started to run from Bear (the puppy), and he dove into the pond. We were thinking that Bear would go around the pond , Accentuate Your Home with an Address Plaque to the other side and continue chasing the bunny, but Bear just dove right in, he was so little though that he had to be rescued from the small backyard , Hydroponics Gardening - An Introduction to Hydroponics Gardening for Beginners (part 18) Gray Mould pond. My husband's only response was "he's going to be a good rabbit dog!" Well, thanks for listening to my story. Sincerely, Roberta Collins Toledo, Ohio Funny Pond , Storm Damage and Mature Tree Pruning Story #4 "A story to share... Two years ago I started with the crazy idea of building , Garden Makeover On A Budget a small pond with koi , Southwestern Landscape Art - An Investment? fishes. After a lot of working I finally built it, and decorated it with all sort of plants. , Wicker Patio Furniture - Buying and Maintenance Tips One day... mi female cat "Manchita" went to the pond , How to Grow African Violets to examine this new construction. She went to the border, jumped on a flat stone , The Art Of Landscaping Your Garden and starter to drink water. , Planning Your Garden from Scratch - the Planting To her big surprise one of the fishes , possibly thinking that the white , How to Naturally Dry Hydrangeas nose of my cat was food, , Rose Success jumped out of the water, , Mosquitoes in Your Garden? Try Planting These trying to eat it.. Can you imagine the surprise of the cat ? I believe that the fish , Wild Flower Garden - Recreate the Splendor of Nature in Your Own Backyard was also quite impressed with the experience. My cat almost fell into the pond , Tulip Bulbs - Fall is the Time to Prepare the Perfect Spring Flower Garden , .. and from then on she never went around the pond , Planning Your Garden from Scratch - the Planting again. She used to watch the pond , Flag Day: Will You Be Ready? from my dorm, located in the second floor and just across the pond. , Best Perennial Plants for Summer Color Unfortunately I did not take a picture of this "accident". I am sending you a pictute of this first pond; in the meantime I did build another, larger one. Unfortunately "Manchita" is not around any more, she passed away a few month ago, from old age.. This story happened in Valdivia, a city located in the south of Chile. In this country winter , How to Conquer Caterpillars is approaching, with lots of leaves falling from the trees , How to Grow African Violets an the plants in my pond , How to Build a Shed preparing themselves to sleep for a while..." Maria Fresard == Funny Pond , 5 Simple Steps to Care For Your Push Reel Mower Story #5 "I have two ponds. , Mosquitoes in Your Garden? Try Planting These An upper and lower pond. , Lawn Mower Racing The upper pond , Catch a Leprechaun in Your Garden is fed by a waterfall , Landscaping of Hindu Religious Places with the source being the lower pond , Revolutionary New Combines Both Preformed Pond with Watercourse (driven by a pump). The lower pond , Gardeners: Contain Yourselves! is fed by an overflow of the upper pond that flows underground for about 70 feet (12 in drain pipe). Last summer I rescued some trout fingerlings from a seasonal stream going dry near my home. , Rose Success I put them in the lower pond. , Growing Vegetables and Fruit by Organic Gardening This spring I was sitting in my kitchen , Flag Day: Will You Be Ready? and could see something flopping on my water fall. , Improve Garden Soil with Cover Crops The trout had migrated up the overflow tube and were trying to swim further upstream via the water falls. , Automate Your Lawn Work No so funny but does show the strength of nature. , How to Build a Shed Just a few weeks ago, Egrets found the pond , Landscaping of Hindu Religious Places and the fish. , Catch a Leprechaun in Your Garden There is nothing left to migrate at this time. Not so funny but does an Egret taste anything like a turkey when cooked?" Tom Gegenheimer == Funny Pond , Wild Flower Garden - Recreate the Splendor of Nature in Your Own Backyard Story #6 "We have only had a pond , Catch a Leprechaun in Your Garden for a short time ... details can be seen at http://thailand4life.net/smithgarden/ The funny story must include the workmen (in Thailand) who took zero safety , Gardening Tips To Excite Toddlers And Preschoolers precautions when constructing the pond. , Why Teak Coffee Tables Are Essential For Your Outdoor Space Watching guys shovelling concrete , Wild Flower Garden - Recreate the Splendor of Nature in Your Own Backyard from a lorry and spreading it across the bottom of the pond , Wild Flower Garden - Recreate the Splendor of Nature in Your Own Backyard ... when the footwear they had was just 'flip-flops' resulted in great entertainment .... especially when. several times, the flip flops came off and were lost in the cement somewhere (eventually found while they walked around bare footed) .... pictures at http://thailand4life.net/smithgarden/images/large/DSC03062.jpg http://thailand4life.net/smithgarden/images/large/DSC03070.jpg http://thailand4life.net/smithgarden/images/large/DSC03060.jpg Strangely it was only the guys .... the women laborers all wore Wellington boots .... maybe this reflects on which of the sexes is really the most sensible?" Regards, Chris == Funny Pond , Your Step By Step Guide To Planting The Perfect Lawn Story #7 "I am building , Growing Vegetables and Fruit by Organic Gardening a pond , Accentuate Your Home with an Address Plaque at this time and I was in the process of building a waterfall , Gardening for Seniors and the Physically Challenged in the corner of a fence. The waterfall , Bedding Plants and Plugs (small plants) is about 3 feet high and 7 feet wide. I thought I was finishing up the waterfall , Mosquitoes in Your Garden? Try Planting These with some flat , Container Gardening: Urban Alternative for Plant Lovers rock on the very top. So I straddeled thewaterfall with my knees on the second ledge and set the flat , Variety In Garden Plants - How To Choose The Best Plants For Your Garden rock on top. When I did this the whole waterfall , Catch a Leprechaun in Your Garden fell down because I build it on blocks and not a pile of dirt. When it fell one big rock caught my foot and I slide down the fall and fell backwards into the pond , Rose Success going all the way under and had a couple of big rocks come down on me. Meanwhile my wife is laughing her butt of at me and I asked her to help me out she slipped on the flat , Teak Adirondack Chairs wet rock that surounded the ponds , Cordless Blowers edge and half way fell in with me. Now my two boys were playing in the yard , Your Step By Step Guide To Planting The Perfect Lawn they are 5 and 3 and saw this happen to us and they thought it was time to got swimming so guess who jumped into the pond , Design Your Own Rose Garden with us, the boys. Nothing like having the whole family in on the pond. , Southwestern Landscape Art - An Investment? We laughed for awhile but then I had to rebuild the whole waterfall , Container Gardening: Urban Alternative for Plant Lovers again and this time I put the top rocks on from the side." Robert H Coppa Jr. == Funny Pond , Concrete Mold Buying Tips Story #8 I decided 300 gallons would be perfect. I did all the math and spent a great deal of time working with more experienced ponders. Somehow when it was all said and done my little 300 gallon pond , Growing Vegetables and Fruit by Organic Gardening ended up being 810 gallons and come to find out it was yet another one of my mathematical errors. Guess I should have paid more attention in that college level math class required for my Associates, right. We got the pond , Teak Adirondack Chairs all up and running but because of the miscalculation we now needed a bigger pump , Wild Flower Garden - Recreate the Splendor of Nature in Your Own Backyard to feed the waterfall so I went to our local , Storm Damage and Mature Tree Pruning water garden , Mosquitoes in Your ? Try Planting These supplier and asked which one to get. Budget was a concern so it was recommended that we got a ¾ HP submersible pump , Gardeners: Contain Yourselves! that cycles 44 gallons a minuet. It was only $70 in comparison to the $170 one that was its comparative alternative so"¦ we went that route. $70 dollars later we had a working pond , Tulip Bulbs - Fall is the Time to Prepare the Perfect Spring Flower Garden with a beautiful waterfall! , Gardening Tips To Excite Toddlers And Preschoolers I was so excited I could hardly wait to get fish. , Automate Your Lawn Work Again budget was a concern so we went to the local , How to Build a Shed pet store and picked up $50 dollars worth of fish, , Planning Your Garden from Scratch - the Planting about 8 fish. , Rose Success 4 large gold Koi, some yellow and a blue , Fast, Biologically Active, Highly-Efficient, No-Turn Composting-Really! Koi. The color , How to Build a Shed excited me so much I never considered what would happen when the fish , Gardening Tips To Excite Toddlers And Preschoolers became comfortable in their new home. , Why Teak Coffee Tables Are Essential For Your Outdoor Space The swam around investigating for a day or two then started to come up missing. , Flag Day: Will You Be Ready? I had it figured that they were hiding or that a cat was getting fed to well but I never figured it was something I could have done. It was the pump"¦ the intake valve on the pump , Rose Success was to large and the fish , Landscaping of Hindu Religious Places were getting to close and being sucked into the pump , The Art Of Landscaping Your Garden though the motor pushed down the hose into my waterfall. , Planning Your Garden from Scratch - the Planting While this is not a funny story, I must have cried for 3 days, I wanted to share it because this is the one thing I never read anything about in all the 6 weeks of reading I did on the web. , Gardening Tips To Excite Toddlers And Preschoolers I can chuckle about it now with a "˜I can"™t believe I didn"™t think of that"™ thought. Had I known this was possible I would have done something to prevent it by caging in my pump , Greenhouse Gardening as a Hobby or spending the extra $100 to get the right kind of pump. , Compost: Food for the Soil Hope someone else can save , Why Teak Coffee Tables Are Essential For Your Outdoor Space a Koi , Patio Design - Add Awnings As A Colorful Finish For Your Patio Design by my blending experience. Thanks, New to ponds , Growing Vegetables and Fruit by Organic Gardening and already thinking of making it fish , Palm Tree Care free!" Sheri Furr == Well that's it for this year's 'Funniest Pond , Hydroponics Gardening - An Introduction to Hydroponics Gardening for Beginners (part 18) Gray Mould Stories'... Hope you enjoyed them as much as I did!************************************************** Brett Fogle is the owner of MacArthur Water Gardens , Makeover On A Budget and several other pond-related websites including MacArthurWatergardens.com and Pond-Filters-Online.com. He also publishes a free monthly newsletter called PondStuff! with a reader circulation of over 9,000. To sign up for the free newsletter and receive our FREE 'New Pond , Discover the Art of Topiary Owners Guide' visit MacArthur Water Gardens , Flag Day: Will You Be Ready? today! ************************************************** |
  
|
Landscape Gardening
- Bamdoo
- Benches
- Berries
- Bonsai
- Building
- Bulbs
- Compost
- Flowers
- Gardening
- Grass
- Herbs
- Hydroponics
- Landscape Design
- Landscaping Ideas
- Lawn
- Lawnmowers
- Mulch
- Orchids
- Outdoor Furniture
- Outdoor Lights
- Patio Furniture
- Ponds
- Roses
- Seeds
- Sheds
- Shrubs
- Soil
- Tomatoes
- Trees
- UK Home and Garden
- Vegetable Garden
- Vines
Seasonal Gardening
mygarden.net.au Gardening | Landscaping | Climate Change | Home Improvement | How To DIY | Home Garden | Interior Design | Home Security | Home Finance | Forum | DIY | Add Your Link |